Denver woman Pamela Esquibel sees the light - a near death experience opens her to new possibilities

 

Pamela says heart and cross shaped images keep showing up in her photos after her NDE.

 

 

Pamela remembers a face-to-face encounter with a grandfather who'd been dead for six years. "He gave me a warm welcoming smile."

 

Reported on June 6th 2012 in the DenverPost.com. Also in the Examiner.com. On August 25th, 2010, Pamela Esquibel's car got rear ended while she was sitting at a traffic light at Federal and Louisiana. The sudden jolt caused her head to snap forward, and then to snap backward.  Whiplash.  "It felt as if it was going to fall off my neck," she remembered. "My ears were ringing and I just felt really, really tired."

She called her husband, who came and dealt with the police. The damage to the back bumper was not serious so she was able to drive home and put herself to bed. Three hours later she awoke feeling nauseous and confused. That evening her temperature spiked and her husband took her to the ER at Swedish. One of the intake nurses asked if she had a made out a will.

"Why?" she asked, beginning to panic. "Is everything ok?" "This," said the nurse, "may be your last night." Hearing those words, Esquibel had an instantaneous whole life review. "I thought of all the time I'd wasted worrying, she said, and of all the things I hadn't done in my life."

Needless to say, she didn't die that night. Her tests and x-rays all came back negative, and with no medical reason to keep her there, the docs put a brace on her neck, wished her well, and sent her home. Later, as she was drifting off to sleep, she had a vision of an aunt who had passed away several years before. "It was as if we were looking at each other in a waking state," Esquibel remembered. "It was a tangible presence."

On the second night, she had a face-to-face encounter with a grandfather who'd been dead for six years. "He gave me a warm welcoming smile," she said, "and blew me a kiss." She was at once delighted to see him, and terrified at what this vision might portend. "I was afraid I was going to die in my sleep," she said. "I kept thinking, 'I can't go now. I have a daughter to raise."

On the third night she received another visitation, this time from her maternal grandparents. "I asked them, 'Am I going to die?' They pointed to a bed and said, 'No, youre ok. Go to sleep and rest. We're here to protect you.'"

Something like redemption finally came on the fourth night. That's when Esquibel saw the light. It was bright and white, enormous and embracing. "I remember feeling so small compared to this huge magnificent light," she said. "It was the best feeling, warm and cozy, like having someone hug you. It was such a contrast to the normal pain of living. I was completely content, like I'd never have to eat or drink again."

Then a voice came out of the light, a man's voice, ancient and admonishing. "Why do you want to live?" it asked. "You haven't been treating your life as a gift. If we let you live, from now on you will work for us." "I'm still trying to figure that one out," Esquibel said. "I feel like they want me to give a message, but I don't yet know what it is."

Her near death experience pulled her out of a depression that had been with her since she'd witnessed the death of her seventy-five year old Grandmother four years before. "It shocked me to see her last dying breath," she said, "how you can just stop breathing and be gone. That's when it dawned on me that I was going to die. So why bother? Why get up and go to work if Im just going to die? It was a totally existential depression. Nobody wanted to be around me because of it. But since the light, Ive started reaching out to old friends and reconnecting with life.  I dont know yet what my mission is, but every day I feel like Im getting closer to it. The phrase, 'Only love is real' keeps popping into my head. I think there's bigger healing I need to do."

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